This week it happened again.
I had to make a decision.
An invitation popped up on my phone.
A birthday.
And then… on the same day, in the same group…
another one.
Two in one week.
And I felt it immediately.
In my body.
A little knot in my stomach.
Okay, not that little.
Because my first thought was:
“I should just say yes.”
Of course.
That’s what I’ve always done.
But then came the second thought:
“Wait… I already know how this goes.”
If I say yes to both,
I will feel it. Not just that day,
but the next one… and probably the one after.
Apparently my body keeps better records than I do.
So there I was.
Phone in my hand.
Trying to be a good person.
And also trying to be a wise one.
Because those are not always the same thing.
I’ve learned something this past year.
I don’t do well with too much in one week.
One is good. Two is… ambitious.
Let’s call it that.
So I made a decision.
Not a big dramatic one.
Just a simple one.
One yes.
One no.
And the surprising part is this:
The one yes actually feels good.
Relaxed. Present. Real.
And the no?
Still a bit uncomfortable.
But also… honest.
And I’m starting to think
that’s not such a bad combination.
STOP.
Yes! I can relate. I'm an introvert, and too much peopling can exhaust me. We need God's wisdom to choose our commitments carefully.
ReplyDeleteI can so relate. Too much puts me on sensory overload as I call it. And yes, it takes me several days to recoup. I am slowly coming to learn to accept myself as I am. Say yes to what I am able, and say no to what I know I cannot. Thank you for writing so honestly as it made me realize, I am not the only one :) Blessings!
ReplyDeleteToo much is too much, I agree! God alone knows our needs before we ask. Simply trust in Hin!
ReplyDeleteHi Aritha, thanks for visiting my blog. I just posted again. I don't like to answer the phone. I don't say yes. I say, I will check my calendar and see if I am free. I like to do things, but sometimes I need to say not when I need the rest. Have a great weekend!
ReplyDeleteKnowing your limits is an important life skill. I am proud of you!
ReplyDeleteFMF #13
I loved this. I had to learn the power of the word No about 10 years ago. I always get the pit in my stomach feeling when we are invited to certain extended family events. (long story as to why). In the last year, a counselor friend gave me some good advice (because I was complaining that I always felt guilty for saying No and I won't lie and say I have another commitment when I don't or if i DO have another commitment and say I can't I'm busy or have an appt and then the family member wants the reason why (or wants to know what it is I'm doing instead and I may not want to share that info). the counselor friend said to simply say "thank you for the invite but I won't be attending that event". and that's it. No reason why, no I'm sorry. no feeling guilty. Just the simple truth.
ReplyDeleteI can definitely relate to this.
ReplyDeletewell done! So real to have to make those types of decisions. visiting from FMF12
ReplyDeleteI can so relate to this post, Aritha! That knot in my stomach. Most people are excited to receive invitations, and I can feel so guilty when I feel dread or anxiety instead. The reality is there are so many things we don't get the option to say no to, like doctor appointments etc... So, when we do get that choice, it's wise as you say to make the right choice for our own mental health.
ReplyDelete