Friday's Fave Five

This week flew by so quickly, so I thought it would be nice to pause for a moment and notice some of the little blessings tucked into ordinary days. 🌿

Joining: Living to Tell the Story - Friday's Fave Five

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1. I started turning our son’s old room into a writing room. Years ago I wrote three books there, so it feels special to sit at a little desk by the attic window again. Somehow being up there feels a little closer to heaven. I’m sharing a photo taken from the window of my writing room while trying out the night camera on my iPhone. 😊

2. On Tuesday I went for a walk, even though I almost stayed home. I’m so glad I went, because the yellow broom was glowing along the path and I spotted the first rowan blossom of the season. I even used one of the photos for a little meditation on my Instagram.

Do you love rowan blossom too? 🌿 I always think it looks so delicate and almost a little wild at the same time.

3. The next day brought steady rain... the kind our dry gardens and fields desperately need. While the rain tapped against the windows, I cleaned kitchen cupboards and listened to a podcast. One little blessing this week was that, for once, I actually enjoyed cleaning. There was something peaceful about quietly working with my hands while the rain fell outside. 

4. I put an old rattan cabinet online for free, and my phone practically exploded with responses. In the end a mother and daughter came to pick it up, and their excitement made the whole thing unexpectedly cheerful and cozy.

Before the girl came to pick up the rattan cabinet, I had already written down a whole list of handy tips... how to clean it, repair it, and keep the rattan looking nice. Apparently I take giving away furniture very seriously. If you look closely at the photo, you can even spot the little note lying inside the cabinet.

5. And one of the biggest blessings this week was finally managing, after trying twice, to write down what I want to say in church tomorrow. In this church it’s customary to give a short introduction speech when you join the congregation, and after two years I’m finally connecting myself to a church family again. It feels a little scary, but also very good. 

P.S. There were also all the tiny in-between moments that don’t really fit into a list... starting a new book, swapping coffee photos with a friend over WhatsApp, laughing because her cappuccino always has the most perfect foam layer while mine looks slightly less impressive every single time.  ☕😂 

How was your week? 

What little blessings made you smile? 🌿

Five Minute Friday – DECISION

Happy to join the Five Minute Friday community this week... 

The prompt is Decision.

Five minutes on the clock… let’s see where this goes.

This week it happened again.

I had to make a decision.

An invitation popped up on my phone.
A birthday.

And then… on the same day, in the same group…
another one.

Two in one week.

And I felt it immediately.
In my body.

A little knot in my stomach.
Okay, not that little.

Because my first thought was:
“I should just say yes.”

Of course.

That’s what I’ve always done.

But then came the second thought:
“Wait… I already know how this goes.”

If I say yes to both,
I will feel it. Not just that day,
but the next one… and probably the one after.

Apparently my body keeps better records than I do.

So there I was.
Phone in my hand.
Trying to be a good person.

And also trying to be a wise one.

Because those are not always the same thing.

I’ve learned something this past year.

I don’t do well with too much in one week.
One is good. Two is… ambitious.

Let’s call it that.

So I made a decision.

Not a big dramatic one.
Just a simple one.

One yes.
One no.

And the surprising part is this:

The one yes actually feels good.

Relaxed. Present. Real.

And the no?

Still a bit uncomfortable.
But also… honest.

And I’m starting to think
that’s not such a bad combination.

STOP.

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

 

Still, a few words: the stained-glass window reads in Dutch:

"My peace I give to you: for you too".

Friday's Fave Five

It’s not Friday anymore, but Saturday… and still I wanted to do this. Just to look back over the week and notice what was there.

~ two walks in the woods ~
This week I was able to go to the woods twice, and I’m really grateful for that. It actually took a while before I could go again. The pollen I’m allergic to had to clear first, and my word for this year is patience — so yes, my patience was truly tested. But now there was space again. The fresh spring green…  So beautiful. I even wrote a blog about it (you can read it here).

~ building something together ~
A friend from my new church and I had coffee together, and I helped her set up a blog. I really enjoyed that... something simple, but meaningful too. I didn’t take a picture of it, but it’s a good memory.

~ seeing the day off ~
My husband and I went out to watch the sunset. We kept walking… until it grew dark and the moon appeared. We saw the lapwing and the redshank again; both back. It was such a peaceful moment, stepping away from the busyness of life.

~ seeds coming up ~
Some time ago, I received a large box with flower and herb seeds as an Advent gift from my son. Each day I opened a little window with a new packet. Now they are starting to grow. That also asked for patience… but it’s so lovely to see them come up.

~ mother-daughter time ~
Today I had a little outing with my daughter. We walked through the yellow rapeseed fields — endless yellow, so bright and beautiful. Just being together like that was a gift.

Grateful for this week.
For what was simply there.
Wishing you a lovely weekend 🌿

When Patience Isn’t Patience

I woke up at 3 a.m. shaking.

Nausea. A pounding head. My chest tight, as if something heavy was pressing down on it. No bad dream. Just my body in full alarm.

And I knew exactly why.

I’m writing a memoir about church pain. I’ve lived through it once. But every time I write it chronologically, my body reacts as if it’s happening again. Church hurt doesn’t stay politely in the past.

Patience Is Not Slow Pushing

My word has been patience. I tell myself I’m not rushing. I know books take time. Healing takes time.

But patience is not pushing more slowly.
It’s knowing when pushing is still pushing.

I wasn’t rushing the timeline.
I was gripping the weight.

Opening My Hands

This morning I listened to a short devotion about praying with clenched fists — naming what you’re holding — and then opening your hands to release it.

When I closed my fists, I knew what I was holding.

Not just the book.
The need to carry it thoroughly. Chronologically. Completely.

As if telling the truth requires reliving everything.

It doesn’t.

I can write sideways. In fragments. With space. Even with humor. I can let the process be held, instead of holding it myself.

Patience, Again

And now I’m sitting here on a day when my head still feels tired. I know I shouldn’t make big decisions when I’m this worn out.

But I do know this:

Patience.

Even if I choose a completely different entry point for this book — that’s okay.

I’m not failing if I change the structure.
I’m not failing if I don’t tell it chronologically.
I’m not failing if I protect my nervous system.

The story isn’t going anywhere.

So today, I’ll let it rest.