Spring where you least expect it

When you're there, you smell it right away. I was standing on a muddy path in the middle of the forest, sniffing the air like a bunny in the grass. Can you smell it too? Just step outside, now!

The scent of spring!
I could smell spring, and its fragrance subtly floated among the trees. Oh, how I love spring; the time when the world seems to come back to life, and the sun's rays awaken nature from its winter sleep.

🌷 It's almost, almost spring.

Birds in the forest
I spotted three great tits hopping from branch to branch. When I grabbed my camera, they chirped as if to say: "Sorry, ma'am, we're too busy building our nest, no time to pose!" And off they flew deeper into the woods. Meanwhile, on the other side of the path, a robin sang its vibrant song, marking its territory. It stayed put but gave me a disgruntled look.

Despite the gray day, the thought of spring approaching filled me with joy. You know: blossoms on trees, bees in flowers.

I wandered up the sandy path, and my footsteps echoed loudly on the loose stones in the rain track: with each step: crunch, crunch. Then I saw the tree... time for a break.

From my diary: February 15

I'm sitting on the Elsterkop, halfway up the slope, and I'm not alone. A bit further, someone is getting a mountain bike lesson. I also see a man sitting on a bench; is he old or young? I can't tell... too far away. Wow, a big bumblebee almost lands on my notebook... now it really feels like spring.

The athletes lively discuss mountain bike braking techniques. The man on the bench gets up and slowly walks down the path, hat in hand. I take a photo of him to capture the mood. I also take a photo of the tree trunk I'm leaning against. Far above my head, I see the words: God Loves You

I reflect on my many, many walks. I feel so blessed, just to be able to walk. Walking takes time, but moving gives me energy and creativity, should do it more often. It makes you a nicer person. A few more sips of coffee and I'll continue.

Sitting as low as I am now - on a tree stump - I see droplets on the twigs of the heather bush. I know when I stand up, they'll be gone. It all depends on how you look at things. From above or from below. I take out my phone and snap a photo of a droplet. Whether it turned out well, I'll see at home.

 

The droplet photo 👆 

Season of loss
From above or from below. It depends on how you view things. I describe the season I'm in as a season of loss... or a personal winter where everything continues while I seem to stand still.

Loss comes in many forms. Some losses catch us off guard and knock the wind out of us. Others follow long periods of suffering and waiting. Sometimes we face the death of a loved one, and other times we may lose our health, independence, home, or church. Loss can cause physical pain and plunge us into spiritual depression. - Gretchen Saffles

God surprised me
Yes, the pain is there, the confusion, the sadness, but also beautiful moments of prayer and surrender. I would never consciously choose this season, but it's precisely now that He helps me to deepen my roots in His Word and presence. In this season of loss, God surprises me with His gifts.

Spring where you least expect it
Standing with both feet in the mud of life and yet, I cherish the thought that spring can appear anywhere, especially where you least expect it, in the dark corners of your life.

😍 That makes me happy.

Kneeling for a photo
On my way back from my walk, I see a cluster of crocuses by the path. Even better: just then, the sun breaks through with spring warmth. I kneel down to take photos, not one, not two, but a whole bunch of pictures I want to have. So happy with this moment.

Dear Lord, grant our souls a spring,

Thou know’st our winter has been long;

Shine forth, and warm our hearts to sing,

And thy rich grace shall be our song.

🌷 Wat flowers did you see in your neighborhood?

💜 My crocus blog

Will the sun shine again?

And there I go again. I saw on the weather app that the sun was shining, so off to the woods! 

But I feel so awful, I initially protested, imagining what if I fall ill in the forest, lying there somewhere. Come on, you know it's not like that. #selftalk

As I walk into the woods, it starts to rain gently. Well, let it rain, let it be winter, because it is! I think of the book I bought last month: 'Wintering'. How many times I whispered, "Oh really, you too?"

I am a swirling wreck of uncertainty, my thoughts shoot off like branching paths in all directions, and I'm afraid my head is about to overflow. That lump of ideas remains stuck in my throat, refusing to come out so I can put them on paper. The only thing I can do is walk. I have nothing else. Katharine May

No perfect picture.
The only thing I can do is walk. I capture a random picture because I don't feel like getting down on my knees for the perfect shot.

... And then I spot a patch of blue sky calling out to me: "this way, this way!" 

• Mud? No problem, I trudge through it.
• Downpour? Also fine, let it pour.

Stay on your feet

In the woods, life doesn't ask much of me, just: "Watch where you're walking, lean on your stick, stay on your feet." And thus, I escape my overthinking.

Green and ugly brown
Along the way, I find a twig with a mix of lively green and ugly brown, and that's exactly how I feel. I hold my breath: please, don't let the brown dominate! I take 4 photos to capture this image - to think about later - and place the twig back on the fallen tree.

I strongly feel that I've let stress build up so much that it's been nibbling at me, and I should have asked for help sooner. But stress is also something shameful, an admission that I can't handle pressure. Secretly, I'm glad I'm struggling with physical pain. Rather than the vaguer feeling of being crushed. Katherine May

While raising children and writing books, time has flown by so quickly that I no longer have a clear picture of it. Not that the passing years are entirely blank, but they are muddled, strangely devoid of meaning, except for the clawing awareness of survival. Katherine May

Does that define who I am?
My piece of blue sky disappears, and it's now raining heavily. I catch drops in my hand and wash my cheeks with them... indirectly also my brain: is it really that bad if some of my plans fail, if I'm not achieving victories right now, if the book I so eagerly want to write only exists in my dreams?

Does that define who I am?

Neuh (nah)

Look at me now, I've worked so long and hard that I've made myself sick. And worst of all, I've almost forgotten how to rest. I constantly feel rushed. I'm convinced everything is important and that I'm falling short all the time. And my home - my beloved home - has become one big mess, where everything is slowly collapsing and breaking and worn out. I stand powerless against it. Katherine May

The sun!

Slogging down through the heath, and when I'm almost there, the rain stops. The brown heath glows like gold. Still, the sun! I see a nice spot to have coffee by the tree

👇 (see collage)

... and as I drink my coffee, I think about how nice it is to just "be" and softly pray, even if I don't find the most beautiful words today. It's just enough. And: the sun will definitely shine again

More than a name
Katherine May writes in her book 'Wintering': God has always been a name we whisper. I add to it for myself with a quote (once saved on my iPhone) 

In uncertain times, there is a reliable anchor: trust in the Name of the LORD. Why is His Name so reassuring? It is the "I AM," confirming His own existence. A strong foundation to lean on. People fail, but He, the "I AM," is always alive. Even when everything seems dark, He says: "I am here." His name promises immutability. He remains "the same yesterday, today, and forever" (Hebrews 13:8). Trust in this unchanging God, whose love, faithfulness, and strength are steadfast. It's a reassuring anchor, even when it's winter in your life. Source: Spurgeon and a bit of me

I pass on that Name through blogging: Immanuel!

 “We must learn to invite winter in. We may never choose to winter, but we can choose how.”

---- 

I walked in the area of  the Elsterberg or Elsterkop. It's a hill in the municipality of Rhenen in the Dutch province of Utrecht. The hill is located north of Elst and east of Amerongen, and is part of the Utrechtse Heuvelrug ridge. The hill is 62.5 meters high. On the south slope of the Elsterberg, there are several burial mounds. 🚶‍♂️🌳

Linked to: Paula's Sweet Tea & Friends Link Up

Unfiltered: When My One Word Let Me Down 🌟

So, this year, I thought "healthy" would be my thing, a simple fix. But let's be real – it's been more like a roller coaster with allergies and stress hormones thrown in.

January brought the loss of my father-in-law to cancer, and then February served up a surprise church plot twist (church division) 🙏 Perhaps 'healthy' wasn't the ideal word for a season where life had its own script!

Truth is: I tried to make better choices, but I'm no health guru. Some days, I mess up, choose not-so-healthy stuff, and just feel like I've goofed.

My grace is sufficient for you
Here's the deal – I'm learning that God is there for me. His grace covers me, especially on those not-so-great days. It's like a safety net for my imperfect self. Even when I'm a mess, He is there, whispering, "My grace is enough for you."

I asked God for health, but...
As the year wraps up, I'm letting go of the pressure to be a health superstar. Whether or not I pick another word, I'm just rolling with it and accepting that I'm me – flaws and all. Because, let's be real, God and His grace in Jesus are the real deal in this imperfect journey of mine. 

💔 I need Him every hour.

I asked God for strength,

but, He made me weak

so that to His will . . .

I would daily seek.

I asked God for health,

but, He made me queasy

so that I would see . . .

the faithful race wasn’t easy.

I asked God for riches,

but, He made me poor

so that I would hear . . .

Jesus’ knock on the door.

I asked God for happiness.

but, He made me sorrowful

so that for my sins . . .

I’d repent and be mournful.

I asked God why,

I didn’t get my heart’s desire

He told me it was because . . .

I AM so much wiser!

Deborah Ann Belka

😊 Have you ever chosen a One Word? If so, how was that experience for you? 

Linked to Sweet Tea & Friends